Word Of the Week #542: Holidays
December 24, 2014 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on Word Of the Week #542: Holidays
Holidays – festive; joyous times free from work or studies.
How do the holidays make you feel? Do you travel to be with your family? Do you spend time with family that lives out of town?
Since today is Christmas and I am “free from work” I am running this past WOW. Long time subscriber John always makes me belly laugh when he replies to my WOW’s. This is what he wrote after my WOW on family.
“I recall a quote from an elderly Aunt of mine back in the 50′s that always stuck in my mind which occurred after a family “tiff” during the annual Thanksgiving family get-together many, many years ago.
Three members of the family were particularly known for getting on each others last nerve. During a particularly “animated discussion” my Aunt, who was known to enjoy her homemade Elderberry wine, stood up and proclaimed, “A toast to Thanksgiving, that special time of the year that we get together to remind us why we all moved apart.”
The saying goes, “You don’t get to pick your family, but you do get to pick your friends.” You may not be able to control their behavior but you can control yours. You can either choose to not be reactive or to not be around them. My mother used to tell me to “ignore your brother” a lot. As I have gotten older I don’t need to ignore him as much as just understand “he is who he is.” And “I am who I am.” We get along a lot better now!
This week’s focus is on Holidays. Do they make you feel festive and/or joyous? Or do you feel stress? In a perfect world what could you do to make them more joyful? What behavior could you change to reduce your stress?
And just for a little FUN, stressed spelled backwards is desserts! Maybe you need more of those. Here’s to having a wonderful Holiday!
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Word Of the Week #541: Endorphins
December 18, 2014 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on Word Of the Week #541: Endorphins
Endorphins: hormones in the brain that reduce the sensation of pain and affect emotions.
Have you ever experienced the “runners high?” Would you like to have greater feelings of happiness and well-being? Can you imagine having a natural pain killer, like a narcotic, with no harmful side effects anytime day or night?
This week’s WOW comes from feedback from long time reader Joe when my response to his email on WOW # 535 on smiling wrote, “Even when things are not going great in our lives, it makes us feel better if we just smile.” To which I wrote back and said, “And when you smile it increases your endorphins and that makes you feel even better!”
Then I went to my favorite on line source for definitions, TheFreeDictionary.com which read, “Endorphins are long chains of amino acids, or polypeptides, that are able to bind to the neuroreceptors in the brain and are capable of relieving pain in a manner similar to that of morphine.
There are three major types of endorphins: beta-endorphins are found almost entirely in the pituitary gland, while 
enkephalins and dynorphins are both distributed throughout the nervous system. Scientists had suspected that analgesic opiates, such as morphine and heroin, worked effectively against pain because the body had receptors that were activated by such drugs. They reasoned that these receptors probably existed because the body itself had natural painkilling compounds that also bonded to those receptors.
When scientists in the 1970s isolated a biochemical from a pituitary gland hormone that showed analgesic properties, Choh Li, a chemist from Berkeley, California, named it endorphin, meaning “the morphine within.” Besides behaving as a pain reducer, endorphins are also thought to be connected to euphoric feelings, appetite modulation, and the release of sex hormones. Prolonged, continuous exercise contributes to an increased production of endorphins and, in some people, the subsequent “runner’s high.”
And long time friend Joe wrote back, “I had forgotten about the endorphins part. I know when I am on the phone and smiling, I feel good talking.”
And lastly, this on smiling from the obituary of John Shields, who was the CEO of Trader Joe’s and was responsible for making it a national powerhouse chain, “When he interviewed someone for retail, he wouldn’t hire them if they didn’t smile within 30 seconds.”
This week is all about endorphins! How often do you smile in the course of the day? How about your staff or co-workers? Have you ever put much thought on the importance of hiring people who smile?
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Word Of the Week #540: Perseverance
December 11, 2014 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on Word Of the Week #540: Perseverance
Perseverance – steady persistence in adhering to a course of action, a belief, or a purpose.
Have you ever felt that “As hard as I try I just can’t seem to make it happen?” Are you willing to do “whatever it takes” to get what you want? When was the last time you exhibited a steady persistence in a course of action?
This week’s WOW comes from my student and mentee, Katrina. As many of you know, I am on the board of Fostering Opportunities Scholarships. Our Mission is to continue expanding post secondary educational opportunities for the foster youth of San Diego County, by providing them with mentors and financial support. They are in need of funding for housing, food, and transportation, as well as, their education.
Katrina has been in our program for a year-and-a-half and is majoring in biology. She was 5 years-old when her father died. Her mother was an abusive alcoholic and so she entered the foster care system. She was placed in the home of a woman who was a friend of her father’s co-worker. At one point she lived in a group home.
Katrina says, “There was a time in my life where I was quite frustrated and feeling as though every time I took two steps forward I’d end up taking one step back. A dear friend of mine (she’s also a therapist, what a perk) told me… ‘Katrina, you have a very unstable foundation due to no fault of your own (in regards to my life in the foster system and no real support of family.) You need to allow for room to experience setbacks as you are trying to build a life on an unstable foundation.’
She gave me an example of trying to build a house on a rocky foundation. It can be done but you have to constantly work on the foundation as you build to make things stable. If something comes undone sometimes it means dropping everything to fix it. And it was just then it all made sense to me. Perseverance is going after everything you want out of life and not giving up no matter the setbacks. You endure because being successful means more to someone like me then any set back could.
Fostering Opportunities Scholarships was formed, in March 2002, by a group consisting of social workers, teachers of at-risk students, and nurses. They decided something had to be done for their foster kids, who when they turned 18, were “aged” out of the system. We are a locally operated non-profit scholarship foundation. There is NO paid staff at FOS. We are ALL VOLUNTEER Directors serving on the Board. When asked, “Do board members get paid?” The response given with a hearty laugh is, “No, it costs to be a board member.” I have served on the board for the last 12 years.
This week’s focus is on perseverance. How would it feel if every time you took two steps forward you ended up back one? Would you continue with steady persistence? Do you have a support system that helps you move forward when setbacks arise? Do you think that having an education is important for success?
Let me know if you would like to be a part of my “Team Crisafulli” in raising money for Katrina’s education. You can go to www.MyDollar.org to find out more about our foundation.
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Word Of the Week #539: Gratitude
December 4, 2014 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on Word Of the Week #539: Gratitude
Gratitude – a feeling of thankfulness or appreciation.
How often do you feel a sense of gratitude? Are you thankful for what you have? Do you appreciate your life and the people in it?
Last week the San Diego UT ran this article by Erinn Hutkin titled, “Gratitude has positive effects on health.” She writes, “For many families, Thanksgiving is a time to reflect on and share what they are grateful for. Those good feelings that are often shared during the holidays can have a positive impact on one’s health – especially when people recognize what they’re grateful for year round.
Gratitude is a “Velcro” for all sorts of good things in life – emotional, relational, physical, and spiritual,” says Robert Emmons, professor of psychology at UC Davis and the author of “Gratitude Works!: A 21-Day Program for Creating Emotional Prosperity.”
He ran a study where participants kept a list of a few things they were grateful for and found they tended to exercise more, had more energy and vitality, and were less bothered by pain. He also said grateful people sleep 30 minutes more each night and exercise 33% more each week.
There are also links between gratitude and cholesterol, blood pressure and other biomarkers. In addition, in Emmons’ study, those who kept track of their blessings reported greater well-being and optimism. They also had more attentiveness, enthusiasm, and determination.
Emmons’ goes on to say, “Gratitude is an affirmation of the goodness in one’s life and the recognition that the sources of the goodness lie at least partially outside of the self. Virtually any experience can potentially produce gratitude. That’s partly want gives it its power. Gratitude boosts a person’s positive emotions because it’s incompatible with many feelings that increase worry and anxiety. You cannot be grateful and envious, or grateful and resentful, or grateful while harboring regrets.
Gratitude can also help us when life challenges us. When things are going badly, it provides a perspective by which we can view life in its entirety, and not be overwhelmed by temporary circumstances.
This week is all about gratitude! Would you like to have more energy and/or better health? Would you like to feel closer and more connected to the people in your life? Have you ever written a list of the things you’re grateful for? How many people have you told, “I am so thankful you are in my life?”
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