WOW Word-Of-the-Week #381: Guffaw
November 22, 2011 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on WOW Word-Of-the-Week #381: Guffaw
Guffaw – a hearty, boisterous burst of laughter.
When was the last time you experienced true, unforced laughter? Do you remember what triggered it and how it made you feel? Do you know that laughter can have a positive impact on your health?
This week’s WOW is the polar opposite of last weeks on upsets. It’s important to have balance! In a Washington Post article titled, “HEALING POWER OF LAUGHTER – IT’S NO JOKE : Research shows a good yuk helps immune system, reduces stress” author Carolyn Butler writes, “There is a growing body of research indicating that a good guffaw may improve immune function, help lower blood pressure, boost mood and reduce stress and depression.
“A new study from Oxford University supports a long-held theory that laughter triggers an increase in endorphins, the brain chemicals that can help you feel good, distract you from pain and maybe deliver other health benefits. Research shows that people who laugh need less pain medication after surgery.”
Grandaughter Guffaw
“The key is that real, true, unforced laughter is an energetic, stressful activity that stirs up all of our physiological systems …involving strong vocalization, an increase in heart rate and blood pressure and muscle contractions all over the body,” says Robert Provine, a neuroscientist at the University of Maryland. Endorphins are released only when we laugh till it hurts.”
Provine goes on to say, “Real laughter is unconscious – you don’t decide to laugh; it just happens And when you laugh, you’re almost always in the presence of another person, whether they’re physically present or imagined on radio or TV. Laughter in social settings is 30 times as common as when a person is alone.” People are far more likely to giggle when others do. It could be that it’s the playful interaction with friends, family and lovers that makes the difference.”
For my long time subscribers and audience members you’ve heard this before. And I don’t think we can be reminded too often about the benefits of hearty laughter. So this week focus on who you laugh with. Is it one of your favorite customers, guests, members or clients? Is it one your family members? Or is it one of your friends? The Holidays don’t have to cause “upsets.” All you have to do is stay balanced with some good guffaws!
WOW Word-Of-the-Week #380: Upsets
November 16, 2011 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on WOW Word-Of-the-Week #380: Upsets
Upsets – things that cause mental or emotional distress.
When you become upset are you aware of what has triggered it? Are you able to process that and then easily let it go? Or do you have a tendency to let it bother you for a long period of time?
Once again I want to share a great e-mail from Steve Straus who sends out S T E V E ‘ S….3 – M I NU T E…. C O A C H I N G. He writes, “Today’s Topic – PRINCIPLE: Carrying Upsets (Principles are basic truths that, when applied, cause success to come to you easier and quicker.)”
“We have a tendency to get upset over different things – relationships, money, clients, our jobs, our surroundings, etc. It’s easy for most people to get upset. There may even have been times when you have gotten upset more than once in a day. ”
“The issue around upset is not whether you have it, but how long you carry it. To be upset is not unusual. Unfortunately, for many people it’s also not unusual to carry their upset around and have it negatively influence the rest of their day. ”
“The trick is to catch yourself being upset. That is, to notice how you’re feeling while you’re feeling it instead of being unconscious to it and having the upset run your life. Either it’s in charge or you are. ”
“By the way, upset is a great teacher which shows you what you might need to change in your life. Viewed from that perspective, you may even thank the upset for showing up! ”
“Coaching Point: What can you do to start quickly catching yourself in upset so that you have the choice of letting it go?”
This week’s focus is on upsets. With the Holidays quickly approaching this seemed like the perfect time to share this. Do you have family members that cause you distress? How about regular customers, guests, members or clients? Have you ever become upset by a complete stranger? Don’t let other people’s behavior negatively affect you and you’ll have a FUN Holiday!
Reader Responses
“To be honest I always thought the word upset misleading. Wouldn’t “downset” be more accurate? After all whenever we use the word it’s always related to a “downer” crisis or bad news.” – John
“We are human and will therefore be susceptible to upsets. They happen. If I have learned anything in my short time on this planet, it is to allow myself to feel the upset. Usually I will recognize it and express what I am feeling. Once I get it out of my system, it’s over, and I move on. That is how my wife and I deal with upsets in our families. The key for us is that we do not let that upset carry over to the next day. We deal with it, explain how we feel, figure out how we will deal with it, and then move on. Sometimes my wife does not like how I express the upset, but she knows how I am feeling. I usually say to Kristen: “You will know when I am upset or mad. Because I will tell you.” I will not fly off the handle at home or at work. Expressing anger, especially verbally, can be inappropriate. I have worked hard not to take out upsets or anger on others. And it does take work. But I have achieved a semblance of sanity even when the upsets can be hard to bear. My 10-year-old asked me week ago why I don’t react to situations like my wife does. I told her that because I am 11 years older than her mother, I have seen and experienced many more difficult situations personally and professionally, and have learned how to deal with people in those situations. Thus, I do not get worked up over things that are small like accidents that are really no one’s fault. I just try to roll with the punches as best as possible and NOT REACT. REACTING or OVERREACTING is how the molehills become the mountains. I finished my explanation by telling my daughter, “It gets better.” A problem many people have is that when upsets occur the response is, “Why does it always happen to me?” They are so wrapped up in their lives that they can’t see the forest for the trees. Not having control is a problem also. If these people who caused this upset would have just done things MY WAY, this never would have happened in the first place! WHY ME? WHY ME? WHY ME? If things don’t improve, then resentments begin to form. And, as we all know, resentments are a killer. But, it does get better. Thanks for the word, Susan. Take care. Have a wonderful Thanksgiving.” – “Warrior” Joe
FUN-travel: UK – London – Stonehenge – Salisbury
November 10, 2011 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on FUN-travel: UK – London – Stonehenge – Salisbury
Day 33 – Sunday, October 16 – London, Heathrow Airport – Hilton Hotel
Downtown Salisbury
- Arrive Heathrow 4:30 (get our hour back)
- Go through customs – get bags – Duty Free wine (2 bottles for 12 lbs) – figure out train to Terminal 4 – 10 minute walk
- Arrive Airport Hilton 6:00 & get 2 free drinks! but that’s it (we really miss being spoiled in Concierge level & all the “extras” since Chris retired) – pre-paid, non-refundable rate (8 months ago) 119 lbs w/taxes 144 lbs per night (rack rate 400 lbs) internet is extra!
- Check w/Concierge on how to get to Stonehenge – sounds too complicated – go back to Terminal 4 to both TI & National Express Bus Station – no help whatsoever! can’t believe this is so complicated
- Come back & recheck w/Concierge – come up w/3 options – take 6:30 am bus (that’s not even an option) – hire driver for 200 lbs (that’s not an option either, too expensive) – or rent a car maybe – 100 lbs (includes fuel)
FUN-food Dinner – Hilton Deli/Coffee Shop – Burger w/fries ordered med rare & told only well done (after questioning manager he said he’d ask chef to cook less & if not happy would get me something else) was good served med – Greek type salad & 2 pints – 45 lbs
CFFO (Control Freak, Freak Out!) – gave UK & Europe road atlas’s to Mary since we weren’t driving anymore!
Day 34 – Monday, October 17 – London to Stonehenge & Salisbury
Stonehenge
- 7:00 wake up – go down for coffee – 4.20 lbs for small cup! (that’s over $6.00) 5 lbs for large cup – get that, take to room & share
- 7:30 see first sunrise on trip!
- 9:00 bus to Terminal 5 to check Stonehenge bus options – not going to work!
- Pick up phones for car rentals – Avis 125 lbs for automatic, diesel w/GPS – EuropeCar 110 lbs – no one else answers – walk out to pick up area & Enterprise bus is sitting there – ask driver cost of car he says “60 or 70 lbs” – We’re on it!
Salisbury Cathedral
- Get to Enterprise & you’d think we are the King & Queen of California! Never have we ever been so welcomed and helped – service was off the charts 10 ++++ – our new car rental company for sure! 65 lbs – mid size, diesel, automatic
- Depart 10:15 w/Garmin (programmed American English – Jack) to Stonehenge (73 miles) & return – I am the backup ” American English – Jill”
- Arrive 11:30 – Stonehenge (meaning hanging stones) was up for one of the New 7 Wonders of the World – as old as Pyramids (5000 yrs) – older than the Acropolis & Colosseum – stone circle “built by giants” is different from others in England – has cross-pieces spanning the vertical monoliths & the only one with smooth, uniform stones – each one designed to calculate the movement of the sun, moon & stars – monoliths were built out of sandstone & weigh about 35 tons, came from 20 miles away – shorter “bluestones” came from Wales – 240 miles away – question is, “How did they get there? And why didn’t they use the stones that were nearby?”
- Ask bus driver in parking lot how far Bath is – he says, “Have you been to Salisbury? I’d go there. It’s really cute & close.”
- Depart 12:30 for Salisbury (8 miles)
- Arrive & Park 1:00 – really cute Medieval town
FUN Candy Store
FUN-food Lunch – Patisserie Valerie – Tricolore Salad – tomato, mozzarella, avocado, olives, balsamic pesto – Ciabatta sandwich w/same ingredients as salad – 2 cappuccinos – 24 lbs
- Walk thru town
- Salisbury Cathedral – built 1220 – England’s tallest spire @ 404 ft &- took only 38 years to build Cathedral Green – enormous area surrounding cathedral is largest in England
Local Talent
- Window shopping
- Depart Salisbury 3:45 – American English Jack works wonders!
- Arrive Heathrow 5:15 – need gas & saved again by Jack!
FUN-food Dinner – need a snack so order soup – the worst! tasteless, watered down – 8.5 lbs
FF (FUN-facts) – Had a lovely last day in Salisbury – even got Chris to feed the meter for 3 hrs! Major breakthrough!
Day 35 – Tuesday, October 18 – London to HOME! non-stop – full on sun w/light wispy clouds
- Depart hotel 10:30 – arrive Terminal 10:45
- 1st stop – Costa Coffee
- FUN-food Breakfast – scone w/classic cornish clotted cream, strawberry jam & 2 coffees – 5.50 lbs (clearly cheaper to eat in airport)
- 12:05 – check in for 3:05 flight
- Duty free for Jameson you can’t buy in US
- 1:00 – British Airways Lounge – never seen such a spread of food anywhere in world (or booze either)
FUN-Food Snacks – Cold Food Bar w/green salad, pasta salad, & bean salad, meats & cheeses – Hot Food Bar w/pasta, marinara, rice, beef stew, chili, Indian spiced chicken, vegetable curry
Belgium Beers
- 2:20 – catch transit to Terminal 5 B concourse
- 3:05 take off on time
FUN-food Lunch– smoked salmon & trout roulade w/radish & fennel watercress salad – fresh seasonal salad w/vinaigrette – Chicken Kiev w/tomato & artichoke sauce, parsnip chips & creamed spinach – chilled main course salad of grilled king prawn w/Thai noodles & cashews – wine choices Chateau Dasvin-Bel-Air 2009, Haut-Medoc, Bordeaux, France – Medalla Real Carmenere Gran Reserva 2008, Colchagua Valley, Chile
Belgium Waffles
FF – we have never taken the insurance option & never wrecked (let alone scratched) a rental car in all the years we have rented them for business & pleasure in the US
Trip Recap
Travel is very personal. So why did we take this trip at this time? Chris got the book “WHERE To Go WHEN” and said to me, “Honey, we can go to the Arctic Circle to see the Polar Bears or we can go to Galway Bay for the Oyster Festival.” Well that took about 3 seconds to answer! Galway sounded like the most FUN – and it was! Every time we take a trip we think about what we liked and disliked to help us plan better the next time. We also want to take the most physically challenging trips now rather than later. This trip had way too much driving! I think mixing cruising with land tours is ideal for us. Also, we like warm weather so we have decided the only cold weather trips we are willing to takeare to the North & South Poles. When it comes to buying travel books – we LOVE Rick Steve’s!
FF – have renewed faith in GPS & am receptive to thinking about getting software for our Garmin for next Europe trip (don’t really ever want to drive again!) but you still need a road atlas!
WOW Word-Of-the-Week #379: Principle
November 9, 2011 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on WOW Word-Of-the-Week #379: Principle
Principle – personal disciplined value.
Did your parents ever tell you that you should do something because of “the principle of it?” Have you ever been unyielding in a situation because of “the principle of it?” Have you ever been expected to do something that clearly was against your principles?
I have been in situations where I was not willing to budge and flat out said, “It’s the principle.” A perfect example is when I am over charged by a retailer. Even if it’s less than a dollar I let them know. My friends always have me check the addition on the dinner check to make sure there aren’t any mistakes. And by the way, even when I have not been charged enough, I make a point to let them know. Because “it’s the principle.”
We had an experience on our last trip in Europe that put us in a very uncomfortable situation. The last portion of our trip was a week in Belgium. We went there because my niece Mary’s husband took a 3-year job transfer. They live in a small town in a very rural area. The bigger city nearby is where the Caterpillar plant and Master Card Worldwide are located. They employ people from all over the world.
My brother and sister-in-law had flown in the same week. We met for dinner at one of the local restaurants and had a great meal and great wine. When it came time to pay we pulled out our Visa cards and ask them to split the bill. When they brought the credit card processing machine to the table they told us, “We can only take cards that have the chip in it.”
In Europe all credit cards have chips and in the US we “swipe” our cards. The restaurant had signs that said they accepted Visa and that’s what we told our server. She said, “We can’t take your Visa. You’ll have to go across the street to the ATM to get money.” Well, that just didn’t sit well with us. Being “the principle” and all. So my brother said, “It’s not my problem that your machine doesn’t take swipe cards. To which the server said, ” “It’s not my problem.” Next came the owner who explained that their bank was the problem because they only allow cards with chips. Why should we as customers be inconvenienced and have to pay ATM extra fees?
What would you have done in that same situation? It actually surprised us when the owner came back to our table with his bank account number and trusted us to make a deposit.
This week’s focus is on “the principle of it.” Do you have policies that inconvenience or penalize your customers, guests, clients or members? Do you charge for items that others give away for free? Do you add value by including extras and making people feel good about doing business with you?
Reader Responses
“This makes perfect sense to me because as an “active” youngster” attending a parochial school I would often find myself being disciplined by the “principal.” – John
“Based on recent events at Penn State, your word is incredibly apropos. As to your situation with the “chip” credit card, there should probably be some sign in the front door that explains the policy. Because most people in the world pay with credit cards when on vacation. Short of that, the waiter himself should have explained the policy so there would be no confusion. Unfortunately, there are many operations that do not communicate well, and situations like yours are the result. At Penn State, Coach Paterno covered himself legally by letting the athletic director know what was reported to him. But as far as we know the coach did not follow up by calling the authorities. We don’t know if the coach was made aware of the campus police investigation of his former assistant coach. If he wasn’t, he should have known; so should the university president. So, on principle, Coach Paterno should have called the authorities. On principle, based on what he knew of the specific incident, he should not have allowed the coach back on campus. He did not, and unfortunately he wiped away 60 plus years of trust with a moral lapse. It is too bad. Now, he can’t finish an otherwise distinguished career with dignity, he has to live with how his moral lapse affected other children who were molested by his former coach. Disappointment is the main word that comes to mind. Standing up for principle is a lesson for all of us. Thanks, Susan. Continued success. P.S. Al McGuire told me once: “In coaching, there’s always something in the shade.” – “Warrior” Joe
WOW Word-Of-the-Week #378: Resonate
November 2, 2011 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on WOW Word-Of-the-Week #378: Resonate
Resonate – to evoke a feeling of shared emotion or belief.
Did you pay special attention to each weekly WOW on influence? Did any of them resonate with you personally? Did you catch yourself being swayed by a retailer?
I found three specific instances where I caught myself after the fact. The first was in reference to this quote on influence. “We can’t be expected to recognize and analyze all the aspects in each person, event, and situation we encounter in even one day. Instead, we classify things according to a few key features and then to respond mindlessly when one or another of these trigger features is present.”
I ordered a mocha because it was listed second on the menu board. I always drink cappuccinos or lattes (which are usually listed first.) When I made a comment to Chris about my coffee being sweet he said, “I wondered why you ordered a mocha.”
The second time I caught myself was with regard to this quote on social proof. ” We view a behavior as more correct in a given situation to the degree that we see others performing it.” I found myself walking on red lights because everyone else was.
The third time was with regard to this quote on scarcity. “Probably the most straightforward use of the scarcity principle occurs in the ‘limited number’ tactic, when the customer is informed that a certain product is in short supply that cannot be guaranteed to last long.”
The sole on one of my 12-year-old black Ecco shoes shredded and I needed to replace them. I found a pair I liked that were two toned gray and black. They also had the same shoe in red and black (which made them more limiting.) Wanting to make sure I had made the right decision I went to three more shoe stores. I came back to the first store and tried them on again to make sure they were comfortable. The sales girl helping me said, “These should go with everything. The red ones have been flying off the shelf.” Needless to say, I bought the red ones. And they are oh, so, FUN!
This week’s focus is on what resonates with you. What have you experienced that has invoked a shared feeling of emotion or belief? Have you tried any of the principles on your customers, guests, clients or members? Were you able to sway or influence them to purchase your product?
Reader Responses
“Resonate is a word that has become part of the mainstream lexicon. If something I see, read or hear strikes some kind of chord in me, usually emotional, I will have some kind of reaction – oftimes visceral. Also, if an ad, a song or something appeals to one of my values, it will resonate with me. If it is hokey and not genuine, then it will not resonate. There is so much artifice in the marketplace, most of us are able to figure out what the real McCoy is. But when something hits that genuine chord, something inside of us – it is inexplicable – is affected. Those are generally the most successful. Thanks, Susan. Have a great weekend.” – “Warrior” Joe