WOW Word-Of-the-Week #81: Spirit
May 13, 2009 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on WOW Word-Of-the-Week #81: Spirit
Spirit – a mental disposition.
Would you say your mental disposition is positive or negative?
If you said, “It depends on how my day is going,” then you’re probably pretty well balanced and know that your disposition can change based on your circumstances.
Daniel Goleman, author of Emotional Intelligence, says, “Downs as well as ups spice life, but need to be in balance. We very often have little or no control over when we are swept by emotion, nor over what emotion it will be. But we can have some say in how long an emotion will last.”
In other words, you choose to have a positive or negative disposition. It helps if you have people around you that support your spirit!
“In everyone’s life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.” – Albert Scheittzer
Whom do you know that can help you rekindle your spirit? Whose spirit have you helped to rekindle? This week focus on your inner spirit and how it affects your disposition.
Reader Responses
“ATTITUDE IS VOLUNTARY! I have always said your “Attitude Determines Your Altitude” so, when you have a bad attitude, you are flying low and you better watch out, you might just run into a mountaintop or the tree line. However, when you have a great attitude, you are flying high. Building our lives around our passions and attitudes is more than a Philosophy. It is about living an “inspired life” and inspiring those around us along our journey. I have found my inspiration in family, my wife, friendships, my career, nature -“my love of the great outdoors” and the creator. I have my collection of books, memories of family trips and lots of photos. I live without envy, for my life is complete. Our travels have brought us so many life experiences; it was said to me one day that “The world around us is a book and those who have not traveled have only read one page.” I want to read the entire book and not just one page or chapter! When I go to the library or bookstore, I often just stand there in awe, as I look around me, realizing that I am surrounded by all of this knowledge. Everything we would ever want to know has already been written. Then, there is the Internet, giving us every resource literally at our fingertips. However, there is nothing more enjoyable than reading my favorite book, sitting in my comfortable chair, sipping on a cup of hot tea. There is something to be said for simplicity and silence, as we sit there reading, while our minds are in another world. Once the mind has been stretched, it never regains its original shape. The mind functions like a parachute, it functions only when open. When you reflect on life, it is made up of more than moments and what is now. It is also about the many memories of the past and anticipation of the future. It’s not the destination of life in as much as it is about the journey. However, what happens is we sometimes get so focused on the final destination that we fail to enjoy our lives in the moment. I have found that my golf game is similar to life and that it is much more enjoyable to play golf when I play each shot at a time, savoring every hole (especially when I hit a great shot), drinking it in like water, as if I were in the desert.” –Don Vance
“Someone told me once that our attitudes or dispositions are 90 percent of the equation. If we exude that positive energy in our relationships with others, whatever the situation we are dealing with at the time, most people will want to be around us. Obviously, not every day is going to be a good one. Things are going to go haywire in everyday life; that is just life. How we react or overreact to situations where we don’t have control says a lot about our dispositions. I generally try to ACT rather than REACT. My wife, Kristen, is just the opposite, so we complement each other well. A good example of this was my younger brother’s funeral nearly four years ago. My family asked me to give the eulogy during the memorial service. The one comment from friends and family after the service, was that I made them all feel uplifted as they left the church. Kristen noted that I “looked so composed at the pulpit. I could never do that.” I always believe that we can all reach back into ourselves, when the situation calls for it. I think we all are surprised at what we really have inside. What was important to me was to be positive and stand tall for my family. I know there are people in life who do not believe in positive mental attitude, but mind over matter truly works wonders. Most people don’t make use of most of their minds. It controls so much of who we are physically, emotionally and mentally. Keeping that positive attitude up, keeping a smile on our faces and looking forward to good things. Every once in a while at work, I will kid some of my younger co-workers that I am approaching my “dotage.” I will be 48 in a couple of months, but feel much younger. I actually am looking forward to my 50th birthday in a couple of years. I do believe that positive attitude and looking forward with relish instead of dreading the future makes a difference in our long-term health and well being. My Godmother’s husband turned 90 last year. And while his eyesight is now failing him, he still plays golf with his friends and works out as often as he can during the week. When we talk, we talk about how important attitude is and what it can mean for our lives. He is my role model. Great word, Susan. Have a great week. Take care. “Warrior”–Joe Moran
WOW Word-Of-the-Week #80: Likeability
May 13, 2009 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on WOW Word-Of-the-Week #80: Likeability
Likeability – the ability to produce a positive emotional experience in someone else.
How would you rate your likeability factor? How would your co-workers rate you?
USA today featured an article on the book, “The Likeability Factor,” by Tim Sanders. He says, “Organizations have traditionally focused on competencies and thinking ability of their staff. There is growing recognition, however, that job effectiveness can be undone if an employee is not likeable.”
How important is it to be likeable and have likeable employees?
- Likeable employees are favored by co-workers. “People don’t want to work with someone who is disliked, no matter how skilled they are.” – Harvard Business Review Study
- Likeable employees can influence customers. “60% of customers say that, when faced with rudeness, they take their business elsewhere, even if it means going out of their way or paying a higher price.” – Eticon Survey
- Likeability can help career advancement. Likeable employees are more likely to get bigger pay raises and promotions.
This week focus on rating your likeability, and if applicable, your employees. “Be careful not to try too hard, it may come across as unfocused or desperate. Also, you can provide training to compensate for missing skills, but it’s almost impossible to compensate for personality.” – Torry Johnson, CEO Women for Hire
Reader Responses
“I agree with the statement about “trying too hard.” I think that it is easy for people in an office to see through. Obviously, not everyone in the office will like us, but if we can be cooperative and helpful to others when we are approached that certainly inceases our chances at likeability. If a co-worker asks for my assistance, I certainly try to help that person as soon as I am able. If I can’t do something, I try to let them know when I can do it or direct them to someone who can. In the position I have at our office here, it is my job to help make others in the office look good. I get brochures, posters, signs, correspondence and ad circulars to look at every day. What I try to do is make sure whatever it is they give me that it is edited properly, with correct spelling, grammar, wording, etc. I am polite to everyone in the office, even to those who have not been particularly hospitable to me in the six years I have been here. A smile and good attitude goes a long way in a place where we have to spend eight hours with the same people, every day. It is not easy, but it makes the day go by easier. My attitude and likeability and willingness to do things that maybe others have not been willing to do has led to some nice pay raises over the past five years – especially the last two years. So, I am a happy camper at work. I actually look forward to coming into the office every day. How many people can say that? Thanks for the word, Susan. Keep up the great work. “Warrior”–Joe Moran
“Life is too short not to have fun – EVERY DAY! As a writer I know once told me: “Have dessert.” I know that everyone is not going to like me. I don’t have time to dwell on why that is, so I move on. There are too many people to meet and learn from in my life. Hey, the sun is shining, the clouds are gone, the skies are blue and WE’RE HERE! I can’t wait for your next word. Keep up the great work, Susan. All the best! “Warrior”–Joe Moran
WOW Word-Of-the-Week #79: Laughter
May 12, 2009 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on WOW Word-Of-the-Week #79: Laughter
Laughter – to give audible expression to an emotion.
Dixie Lea 1944 - 2006
How often do you laugh? To me a laugh is one step beyond a giggle. Did you know that laughter has many benefits?
When it comes to reducing stress, they suggest you repeat your favorite joke. Watch a hilarious comedy. Read a funny book or magazine. Research suggests that laughing increases dopamine, the brain’s natural feel-good substance.
Don’t feel like laughing? Simply hearing laughter can help lift the black mood. Austrian researchers have depressed patients listen to a CD filled with giggles and chortles in addition to taking their medication. Those who listened showed significant improvement compared to those who went without the laugh track.
This week I want you to focus on laughing more. I get the newspaper specifically for the comic strips! Rent a funny movie. Come up with a funny joke you can tell at home or at work.
Every time you laugh you release dopamine. Notice how good you feel and how you are responding to any potentially negative situations that arise. Notice how your laughter reduces your stress.
Reader Responses
“I had a friend who had cancer. She was always in pain and she would watch a hilarious comedy to relieve her pain. It is so true that laughter is good for the soul. It is also catching. Have you ever been in a room with people laughing and all of a sudden you too began to laugh.” — Don Vance
” I believe if one can’t laugh, especially at oneself, then you’re really not living at all!” — Cathie Capolino
“Thanks for the input regarding laughter and dopamine. I was not aware there was a connection. When I get the chance I try to watch reruns of Seinfeld because the story lines and characters crack me up every time I watch them. Kristen and I will rent the occasional comedy for something to laugh at during the weekend. A good laugh really lifts the spirits and makes me forget about whatever minuscule problem I was worrying about that day. While my wife does not like to watch The Three Stooges, I just have to laugh. Those shorts are as funny today as when they were first released. I can’t help but laugh at them. We all could use a good laugh – every day. Take care, Susan. Thank you. “Warrior”–Joe Moran.
WOW Word-Of-the-Week #78: Integrity
May 12, 2009 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on WOW Word-Of-the-Week #78: Integrity
Integrity – firm adherence to a code of moral values; incorruptibility.
Did you know that the number one most sought definition online this year was integrity?
According to John Morse, president of Webster’s, “About 20,000 people looked it up. I think the American people have isolated a very important issue for our society to be dealing with. The entire list gives us an interesting window that opens up into what people are thinking about in their lives.”
Ralph Whitehead, a journalism professor at the University of Massachusetts, said “It may indicate the continuing discussion about American values and morality, or perhaps that integrity itself is becoming scarce so its definition is unfamiliar.”
Now that’s truly scary! I believe the most important thing you have, is your integrity. With all of the political corruption that was exposed this year, I just hope people are not resigning themselves to the fact that “No one has integrity, so why should I?”
Integrity defines who you are as a person. It is what connects you to people. It creates deep trust. Those that have it will attract others like themselves. Those that don’t will attract others like themselves.
“What you do not want done to yourself, do not do to others.” – Confucius
Now the question is, “Which type of person do you want to attract? Do you know what your code of moral values is?”
Reader Responses
“Thought for the day…. Words of encouragement may cost nothing to give,but they’re priceless to the receiver. So give frequently and abundantly.” — John Beck
“INTEGRITY, without it, we will perish as a people. Awesome stuff!” — Don Vance
“This one is particularly good.” — Art Rosengarten
“I really enjoy getting your emails every week. Each word gets me thinking (as it is supposed to do!)and I thought the email this week to be quite interesting. The vague definition of “code of moral values” triggered me to ask…if you have low moral values, but are firm in what those values are, do you still have integrity? I have always been taught that integrity is linked to high moral values and those values were reinforced through my religious upbringing. If someone is raised with values that I consider to be lower than mine, but they were taught to be “firm in their adherence” to what they considered adequate values, I wonder if in their own mind, they have integrity?” –Patricia Ashbrook
WOW Word-Of-the-Week #77: Joy
May 12, 2009 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on WOW Word-Of-the-Week #77: Joy
Joy – to experience or show pleasure or great delight.
- Aunt Cindy & Alexander
So how would you rate yourself on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being the highest when it comes to happiness? After you read WOW #74 did you identify what makes you feel content?
The word joy is in the definition of happiness. And there are different kinds of joy and happiness. A lot of people are looking for happiness externally.
For example, I have heard people say, “If I get a bigger house, a fancier car, get married, etc., then I will be happy.” I believe true joy and happiness are internal. They come from within.
A perfect example is the story I read in the newspaper on Sister Antonia Brenner. She was inducted into the Hall of Fame for Caring Americans. She said, “I never thought twice about giving up my life as a homemaker in Beverly Hills to aid prisoners.”
After visiting La Mesa State Penitentiary 40 years ago, she began volunteering there. Then in 1977, she made the choice to live permanently in one of the prison cells so she could provide prisoners round-the-clock support and protection from abuse. The mother of seven is now known as the “prison angel.”
“Happiness does not depend on where you live,” she says. “I don’t have a lot of pleasures, but I have a lot of joy.”
This week look inside and define what gives you joy and great delight. Steve Straus, the 3-Minute Coach says, “Joy not shared, dies. If you agree, where are you sharing your joy?”
Reader Responses
“Right On! Happiness is a decision we make!” — Don Vance