Word Of the Week #586: Treat
October 29, 2015 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on Word Of the Week #586: Treat
Treat – an occurrence that causes special pleasure or delight.
When was the last time you had a delightful surprise or especially pleasant occasion? Do you enjoy treating others to delightful experiences? How good are you at treating yourself?
This week we celebrate Halloween and so Treat felt like a great WOW. I will feature the first half of Marisa DeMarco’s “25 Little Ways To Treat Yourself Better Every Day.” She writes, “Do you want to be made to feel special and loved? Isn’t it about time you let life work for you rather than you working for it? It’s all possible and within your reach…only if you are ready for it and willing to make the commitment to honor your needs.
- Eat whatever it is that you want; as salty or sweet as it may be. Enjoy it in moderation and without guilt.
- Accept a compliment by saying “thank you” whether you believe it or not. The person who gave it sees something noteworthy about you; trust them.
- Give a compliment to someone when you see something noteworthy about them. Allow for a moment of reciprocated happiness.
- Be kinder and gentler to others; they will in turn do the same for you.
- Be kinder and gentler to yourself; you deserve the same respect you give to others.
- Within your means, save up and buy yourself a special gift. Your effort to obtain it will allow for its appreciation.
- Save up and give yourself the gift of “energy”. Say “yes” when willing and “no” when something feels more exhausting than pleasant.
- Take a 20-minute power nap when your body is tired.
- Dance, laugh, sing, twirl; give yourself permission to let loose.
- Cry, scream, pout, disconnect; give yourself permission to release frustration.
- Let your “mid-ground” be your normal mode of operation. It will keep you steady and capable to handle yourself in whatever situation you’re presented.
- Take pride in yourself; choose your clothes, words, and the people who surround you with careful attention.
And my treat of choice? A nice massage! Thank you Sandra. And of course, jewelry! As they say, “You can never be too thin or have too much jewelry.”
This week’s focus is all about treats. How would it feel to be kinder and gentler to others? How would it feel to give yourself permission to let loose? When was the last time you bought yourself a special gift?
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Word Of the Week #585: Unconditional
October 28, 2015 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on Word Of the Week #585: Unconditional
Unconditional – complete and absolute, and not dependent on certain terms or conditions.
Is there anyone in your life that accepts you unconditionally? Do you help and support your co-workers without any thought for what you might get for yourself? Have you ever failed to do something for someone and they didn’t feel disappointed or irritated with you?
This week’s WOW comes from long time friend and subscriber Joe, who responded to WOW #583 by writing, “I learned a long time ago the importance of giving unconditionally. A lot of takers and matchers probably don’t believe in unconditional giving because life and time are so short that they have to get “theirs,” if they are going to give at all.
The one constant in unconditional giving is something I heard Sir Paul McCartney say years ago: “The more you give, the more you get.” 
But it is not always expecting something in return. There are those who need help who, through no fault of their own, will probably never be able to return what is given them. I have given to friends in my life who I knew would never be able to repay me, so I never asked.
I know that because of the blessings I have in my life, I am able to give and not expect anything. So, I will be able to get what I need in my personal and professional lives no matter what I give to others.
Now, because of my nature, I will not ask people to pay for tickets to a concert or ballgame if I invite them. Usually I will say, “Just buy me a cup of coffee or a drink at the game.” I have always believed that if I invite someone to an event I do not expect them to pay. That is how I was raised. Others insist on “going dutch,” which I consider a four-letter word. Either you pay or I pay. That is what I believe.
When we give unconditionally in our lives – genuinely – it puts good vibes out into the universe. It gives those who receive a positive aura – someone was thinking of me today. That should be an example for others, but in many instances people don’t get the hint. As a result, they don’t pay it forward to others in their lives.
But all of us, in our own way, can give unconditionally. Eventually, most people will get it. But unfortunately, many will go to their graves just taking it for granted and never learn how to give.”
I can say having been someone who has experienced unconditional love and someone who has consciously chosen to give it, it is one of the most profound, and rewarding experiences you can have!
This week’s focus is on being unconditional. Do you believe that you can get everything you need in your personal and professional life no matter what you give to others? Are you able to tell others the truth with gentle, kind communication and be there for them, without judgment?
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Word Of the Week #584: Action
October 14, 2015 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on Word Of the Week #584: Action
Action – something that people do or cause to happen.
Is it easy for you to take action? Do you ever second guess yourself? Is there something you know you should take action on that you are putting off? What is stopping you?
I felt a really strong desire to re-run this WOW. Steve Straus, the author of ST E V E ‘ S…3 – M I N U T E…C O A C H I N G, who I have featured before, sent this titled “Row Your Boat.”
“Wayne Dyer was the first person I heard tell this story, but I believe he gave credit to someone else. It has been around a long time and tells of several great truths.
Row, Row, Row
(Be in action. The universe rewards action.)
your boat,
(Your’s. Not someone else’s.)
gently
(Enjoy the process.)
down the stream,
(Go with the flow. Stop fighting.)
merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily,
(You could be a grump about it, but don’t be.)
life is but a dream.
(Chose to have very good dreams.) ”
— Copyright 2009 Steve Straus. All rights reserved. —
I just love this one! How about you? This week focus on what courses of action you are going to take. Do any relate to your job situation? How about your personal life? How would it feel to live your dream and row your boat gently down the stream? Enjoy the ride!
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Word Of the Week #583: Giver
October 8, 2015 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on Word Of the Week #583: Giver
Giver – a person who has an internal desire to genuinely share.
Do you have an internal desire to genuinely share? How well do you interact with others? Do you believe that you can ambitiously pursue your own goals and equally and simultaneously care about benefiting others?
The UT San Diego featured Adam Grant’s book “GIVE and TAKE” in the article “Being a ‘giver,’ not a ‘taker,” is good for business.,” Authors Barbara Bry and Neil Senturia write, “This book’s premise is simple. Traditionally, the entrepreneurial drivers to success have been passion, hard work, talent, dedication and luck.
But Grant argues (and proves) that success is increasingly dependent on how we interact with others. In other words, success hinges more on effective networking, collaboration, influence, negotiation, and leadership – all of which are informed by and made more valuable by being a “giver.”
Grant posits that there are three kinds of people in the world: “takers,” “matchers,” and “givers.” We all know what a taker is – scorched earth, sort of what’s mine is mine and what’s yours is mine. A taker is always thinking “what can you do for me?” rather than “what can I do for you?”
Matchers are slightly more evolved. They have an internal balance mechanism that measures giving and taking – recognizing the basic principle of win-win, but always measuring. They know clearly when they are not being reciprocated.
And then there are givers. This is the enlightened species that provides service, guidance, care, feeding and comfort without any immediate expectation of recompense or match or equality. The giver is someone who has an internal desire to genuinely share. Now before you chuckle at the naiveté of being a giver, the book also explains how to be a giver with being a schmuck. The giver comes from a position of power, not weakness.
Grant uses many examples of successful high profile “givers” including a quote from a man whom some would consider a world-class taker, Bill Gates. “There are two great forces of human nature – self-interest and caring for others,” and it is proven that people are the most successful when they develop a hybrid engine, mixing the two fuels. He gets it.
Successful givers are “otherish.” They are ambitious in their own goals and equally and simultaneously care about benefiting others.
This week’s focus is on being a giver. Do you believe that you can combine self-interest and caring for others and be successful? Do you keep track of who “owes you” and doesn’t reciprocate? Are you willing to give of yourself without any immediate payback?
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