Word-Of-the-Week #819: Coping
April 16, 2020 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on Word-Of-the-Week #819: Coping
Coping – dealing with difficulties and acting to overcome them.
How well are you dealing with the difficulties the quarantine has caused? How is your boredom level?
This week features the first half of LA Times Travel Editor Catharine Hamm’s article “Bored at home? How to cope and overcome ‘the nothing to do’ syndrome while travel is postponed.”
“Feeling bored, disoriented and cranky now that you’ve put your travel plans on hold and your suitcase away? You have company — lots of it. For many of us, travel has its own rewards, including its role as a stress reliever.
“Travel relieves stress because you are removed from the monotony of your daily life,” said Dr. Howard Forman, attending psychiatrist at Montefiore Medical Center in New York, “and many of the things that lead to stress are taken out of your hands and put into hands of other people,” including those everyday tasks such as fixing dinner, keeping the house clean and, if you have kids, making sure homework is done.
Now what? Most of us are staying closer to home, by design or edict, and the absence of travel’s pleasures can lead to boredom, which, Forman said, is a common complaint. 
Here, then, are some ideas about facing down the tedium.
- Play. “Adults don’t play!” you may say. But why not? Especially when you consider how beneficial it can be.
That doesn’t necessarily mean kickball or hopscotch, unless you want it to.
“Think about the invigorating effect of a date night with your spouse,” Oksana Hagerty, an educational and developmental psychologist, and learning specialist at Beacon College in Leesburg, Fla., said in an email.
“Or a picnic that, for all the mosquitoes, dust and lukewarm Coke, leaves you happy and refreshed? How about a bath with rosewater and candles?”
“Some ideas of play … might be ‘pretending’ to be a healthy eater (by the end of the quarantine you might get used to eating broccoli instead of French fries, but if not — it was play, not a big deal). Or starting ‘a new life’ altogether — some of it might stick, but again, no hard feelings if not.
“As long as we agree that some of what we do can be free, uncertain and governed by the rules that make-believe does not have to be productive, the tedious hours of social isolation won’t be as bad.”
- Reconnect. Try “getting in touch with your body in some way or another,” said Dr. A. Chris Heath, a psychiatrist and psychoanalyst in Dallas. “Walk. Feel the sun and breeze. Try stretching exercises. You don’t have to have a class to do it.”
Maybe resume playing a musical instrument you once dropped, Heath said. “It’s not just a way to make the time pass and not just a way to exercise your mind. It connects your mind with your body again.” When the body and mind interact, “it gets you back in touch with yourself.”
This week’s focus is on coping. Have you come up with any stress relievers? Do you realize all the benefits that come with playing at anything? What are you doing to reconnect with yourself?
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Word-Of-the-Week #679: Coping
August 10, 2017 by Susan Clarke · Comments Off on Word-Of-the-Week #679: Coping
Coping – dealing with difficulties and acting to overcome them.
Do you work in a toxic environment? Are you involved in any toxic relationships? Are you dealing with difficulties in any areas of your life?
This is part 2 of Doug Williams San Diego UT article, “How to stay afloat when your workplace is toxic.” We left off with “The first thing to remember, you can only manage yourself. You can’t control other people, especially if it’s a manager being the toxic factor. And in terms of managing yourself, really, that’s where mindfulness comes in very powerfully, to help the employee realize what they can control and to let go of what they can’t. Sometimes that letting go of what you can’t control is a huge relief for people.”
This week features 5 tips on…
How to cope
Among the strategies Mattice Zundel and Cassisa suggest to mitigate the negative impacts of a toxic work environment:
- Don’t be helpless. Change how you react or work to change the environment. That may mean setting up a discussion with HR, a boss or developing an exit strategy. “Creating a strategy to solve your problem tells your brain you’re resilient and it gives you something to focus on,” says Mattice Zundel.
- Set boundaries. Put limits on how late you’ll stay, what you’ll accept and what kind of office politics or gossip you’ll allow yourself to get pulled into. Leave work at work. Tell the boss what is and isn’t OK for you.
- Engage more. If you see something wrong at work, try to fix it. If you see harassment, don’t let it go. Be an agent of change. It will make you feel positive.
“When you see uncivility or unprofessionalism occur and you don’t step in and put a stop to them immediately, they are allowed to flourish,” says Mattice Zundel. “Then people will continue to push the boundaries until you eventually have a toxic work environment.”
- Do things to de-stress. Exercise releases endorphins that make us feel better. Spend time with friends or groups away from work. Avoid co-workers who drag you down with complaining.
- Find self-esteem elsewhere. If you’re not getting the rewards at work you need, spend time doing something you love — and are good at — such as sports, the arts or hobbies.”
This week is about coping. How comfortable are you at setting boundaries? Are you willing to speak up to stop bad behavior? What activity helps reduce your stress?
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