Word-Of-the-Week #858: Grateful
January 14, 2021 by Susan Clarke
Grateful – warmly or deeply appreciative of kindness or benefits received; thankful.
Have you thanked your family and friends for the gifts or treats you received over the holidays? Did anyone thank you for yours? How did that make you feel?
This week features excerpts the San Diego UT by Sandi Dolbee, “Celebrating the power of these two words: Thank you.” Researchers have found that saying those two, single-syllable words can yield big rewards in our spiritual and physical health.
“Saying “thank you” is good for you.
Seriously, good for you.
In study after study, from here to Tel Aviv, researchers have found that saying those two, single-syllable words can yield big rewards in our spiritual and physical health.
In one project, participants were put into two groups, with one group asked to write about things they were grateful for and the other asked to keep track of the irritations they encountered. After 10 weeks, the folks in the first group were not only more optimistic but actually had fewer visits to their doctors.
Another study found partners who expressed their thanks to each other had healthier relationships.
And a UCSD study of patients with asymptomatic heart failure found that those who had higher gratitude scores, using a six-item scale, were associated with better sleep, more energy and even lower levels of inflammation, which can worsen heart failure.
Part of the upside can be explained this way: Saying and hearing thank you causes the brain to release feel-good neurotransmitters responsible for our emotions.
But here’s the curious part: a national survey funded some years back by the John Templeton Foundation found that while most of us know how important gratitude is, we do a lousy job of actually thanking people. As the findings put it, “A significant gratitude gap exists in America.”
The Rev. Reginald Gary doesn’t have to be convinced. Gary, who has been senior pastor of New Creation Church of San Diego for 25 years, believes this painless phrase is “vitally important” to our mental stability and to doing good in the world.
“I think one of the reasons we have so much anger and grief in the world is that people don’t feel appreciated, affirmed and celebrated — and the two simple words ‘thank you’ does so much more than you can ever know,” he says.
Gary thinks saying it and hearing it motivates us to do keep doing good deeds. “It’s one of the best things you can hear.”
So why don’t we express it more often?
“I think some people have different levels of gratitude,” Gary tells me. “They think what you’ve done for them is something you’re obligated to do for them.” He’s seen it first-hand. “There have been times in my life and ministry that I’ve done things for people and they have just taken it and gone, with never a word of thanks.”
“I think you lead by example,” he says. He advocates teaching children to say it just as soon as they are able to talk. He remembers feeding his now-grown children when they were in highchairs. When they were done eating, he’d remind them to say thank you to he or his wife. “So now it’s just automatic.”
He says “thank you” for both what he has and what he’s been spared. As he puts it: “The key is to be thankful for all the things that make you smile but also be thankful that you don’t have a lot of things that make you frown.”
“If you know anything at all about the science of happiness, you know that gratitude is great for our wellbeing,” writes columnist Jessica Stillman in Inc. Magazine. “It rewires your brain for positivity, boosts your energy levels and if your thankfulness is directed at someone else, makes the receiving party feel great.”
This New Year’s focus is on being grateful and expressing it! How many times in the past month have you said “Thank You” to someone? Have you been able to feel thankful this past year even with all the craziness we have all experienced? Many people I know have expressed being grateful this past year for the unexpected things that have come their way!
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